New Year’s Eve 2010, Seattle Style

January 3, 2011 12:00 am Sir Haxington Seattle

I loves me some New Year’s Eve celebrations. Seattle does a huge fireworks show on NYE and I really wanted to experience it up close and personal. Lucky for me, I have a few friends that live only a few blocks away from the Space Needle and they were throwing a house party. Perfect.

NYE, especially in major cities is also one of the best times of the year to see people going buck-wild and doing things they wouldn’t normally do. And there’s nothing I love more than seeing shiznit go down. Let’s kill two birds with one stone!

First up, a stop by my buddy’s joint. He and his new wife were supposed to come party with us, but they are hardcore outdoor enthusiasts and the weather the next day was killer for a Seattle winter. Clear skies and low temperatures meant great skiing and snowboarding, something they simply could not pass up. They decided to skip partying altogether and get up early to hit the mountain. I can’t blame them.

We still wanted to hang out anyway, so we caught up before they had to go to bed. They have an older pitbull which is fun to roughhouse with on their wood floor. Dragging him around with a giant rope while he growls is entertaining and tiring.

Then the first snag of the night. We needed to be downtown around 10:30 pm, a 15-20 minute ride away. We started calling cabs around 9:30 pm but they were all busy. We kept trying to get through but no dice. Finally my buddy was nice enough to drive us downtown in our own car since we’re coming back there to stay the night anyway. And that’s what friends are for!

So we packed up the comically large bottle of champagne, along with the regular sized bottle in the same bag and head out the door.

Once we hit downtown, we start witnessing the tip of the NYE iceberg. Girls in mini-skirts and heels drunk and shivering, slipping in ice and being saved / dragged around by dudes left and right. It’s freezing out, but people are dressing like its a summer in Los Angeles. So good.

A few blocks from the Needle, my buddy drops us off. Police on foot wandering the streets wearing their heavy gear. I smile and nod at them as we go clanking by with out bottles of good times at our side. We cross the street and pass by a convenience store where a group of drunk dudes are slurring and cursing at one another. As they pass us, one screams “I’M NOT REAAAAAAAL!” I’m pretty sure he was.

Eventually we make it to our destination, but we’re a little early. We sit and wait in the lobby.

Another drunk couple passes us. The girl tries to get in the woman’s restroom, which is occupied at the moment. Her date tells her to use the men’s room, which at first she protests to, but then does anyway. After they leave, two guys enter the lobby each holding and drinking a beer, both far beyond hammered and getting aggressive. I’m on my feet, pacing around checking my phone when they begin testing me.

“They don’t let Mexicans or black people in here! You!…. You’re… a black guy…. they don’t let YOU IN HERE… or me in here…  this is for WHITE PEOPLE only!”

Yes, one guy is of Latino descent and the other guy is black.

My spidey sense is tingling. At least one of them is looking for a fight, they are both severely intoxicated and probably dangerous. I head back near to my bench and take a seat. They get louder and louder, trying to get a reaction from me, when our host arrives through the front doors. Saved.

I find out later those two guys got into a fight outside. Bullet dodged!

So we head to the party upstairs. People begin rolling in, drinking, and having a good time. I met a bunch of awesome and interesting people, although I think I was the oldest there, which was a bit scary for me.

Not long after the party started, it was time for the countdown. The show was about to begin.

We rushed to a window in the second story apartment. What a view! The fireworks show went on for around five minutes. It was pretty awesome. People below were going nuts. A drunk girl in heels was wandering and weaving between cars on the ground, slightly distracting me from the fireworks show. Not that she was attractive, I just thought she might get hit by a car.

While looking up, and thinking that I finally got to see the Seattle NYE fireworks up close and personal, I started thinking about next year. I couldn’t help but think that I want to be at the party ON the Space Needle next time. Maybe it wouldn’t be as cool as seeing the whole thing in full view though. I’ve been up close and personal with crazy fireworks situations in the past it’s definitely different.

Once the show ends, it’s back to the party. I chat with a few more people and try to keep people filling up that Britta pitcher with water. Some people forget because they’re drunk, and man, drunk people need water about as much as a fish in a river.

We take a break and go outside on a balcony. No one else is out because it’s freezing, and I’m rewarded with another amazing experience. We’re on a low, second story balcony with tall apartment buildings surrounding us. Directly below and in front of us is a parking lot and convenience store. Further across are more tall apartment buildings.

Ten minutes after 12 on New Years day is a sight to behold. Surrounded by hundreds of apartments, I felt like I was eating the Whitman’s Chocolate Sampler of the human NYE experience. Loud, thumping music and screaming coming from no less than ten different apartments at once. More screaming, excited and female, louder and louder. People opening their blinds, looking out, and closing them again like they have a bad cases of OCD. People having sex in full window view without a care in the world. Drunk homeless people below yelling then sarcastically screaming “HAPPY NEWS YEARS!” Some guy watching football. Lots of smaller groups partying and just moving about their apartments. Firetrucks and police sirens non-stop. Yes, a few people were even trying to sleep. No doubt the people who had to work the next day. Time and halfers.

We were simply soaking it in. The sound is all being caught and amplified in our cove-like mega-balcony. We looked back and above us a floor, and another couple had their window open, with the lights off and were people watching along with us. They didn’t look terribly happy.

Just then something ripped through the sky, louder than all the ground noise below. A commercial passenger jet was making a landing, screaming in at about a 10-20 degree angle, red and green lights flashing. I couldn’t help but feel bad for the pilots and flight staff on the plane. No doubt, what was happening all around us had a similar, shrunken down version going on inside that tiny flying tin can.

Eventually, it all became the same. Monotonous. General chaos. We decided to head back in.

The apartment was warm. Cozy. It was nice to settle into some normality.

I met and talked to a few more people. People in their mid twenties without a care in the world, just having a good time.

Around 2 am, it was time to leave. People started filtering out and we decided to go as well. We offered to help cleanup but our gracious host wasn’t having it. We asked about taxis, and they pointed us to the Space Needle, saying taxis come there all the time and there should be no problem picking one up. Awesome! Thanks for the great night! Then we leave.

On the way out, we come into another human spectacle. A drunk dude carrying his own personal, empty bottle of bubbly is screaming and pleading back and fourth with someone on the elevator. Some girl and another guy. The elevator shuts, and now we must engage this guy. He’s has a nice watch, a decent suit and some crazy silver shoes. Plenty for me to distract him with.

He makes eye contact. He looks pissed. Oh, here we go. I decide to put the engagement on my terms.

“Hey man! Happy New Year!”

“Yeah… whaaaat. Happy new year…”

“Yeah! Hey it’s going to be a great year right!?”

“Yeah I dunno man… ”

“Hey 2011! High fives lets go!”

He eyes light up. He gets excited. All of us slowly give him high fives, buying time. In a situation like that, you just want to keep people going. Don’t get them mad. Don’t let their minds wander into aggressive drunk thoughts. Just keep em’ on the line until the elevator arrives.

It takes a while.

“Oh man, those are awesome shoes! Where did you get them?”

His eyes light up again.

“Dude. Dude. Thank man. That’s so awesome of you. I got them at…”

Elevator doors open.

“Hey that’s us! Nice to meet you!”

He’s still yammering at us, when lo and behold, the elevator is not only full, but is carrying the same couple he was yelling at before. We get on and make out way to the back of the elevator, hoping he doesn’t see the couple.

He does.

My guess was, the chick was with Silver Shoes. Silver Shoes was ditched for the guy with the chick on the elevator. The bigger, much better looking, and not drunk dude on the elevator. I gathered this because they both were surprised and annoyed, but the good looking dude had that unmistakable shit eating grin on his face. The “I just stole your woman” grin. He said something along lines of “Ha, how is that even possible,” while laughing to himself.

Silver Shoes starts yelling, all my hard-work undone. He charges the elevator just as the door closes and screams. THUMP. Something hits the outside of the elevator door. Maybe the bottle. Maybe his fist. Maybe his head.

People on the elevator start laughing. I remark how awesome that was.

Out on the street, it’s a little scary. Plenty of drunk people are out and about. We get nearly hit by a car crossing the street. I make eye contact with the driver, who looks on apologetically. He has a car bursting with drunk dudes. I feel bad for him. He’s no doubt the DD and putting up with all this.

Lots of frozen spit and puke on the ground. We head through Belltown, notoriously one of the more dangerous downtown Seattle areas, but due to all the people out, I’m not worried. If lots of people are out, you’re safe, generally speaking.

We eventually make it to the completely non-obvious taxi waiting area we were told we “Couldn’t miss” by the Space Needle. An area with a white strip of paint sprayed along the curb. We had to ask three groups of people and a police officer where this was.

Over at the McDonald’s just across the street, an ambulance is parked with its siren on. Police cars are everywhere, and a guy is yelling incoherently above it all. The streets are partially blocked off and traffic is horrible. And there’s no taxis to be seen.

Eventually, an Escalade arrives. In broken English, the guy yells “Need a ride?”

“What the hell is this,” I think. This is no taxi I’ve ever seen. Mental red flags are shooting up left and right.

So I talk to the guy.

“I’m a towncar!”

Okay.

“Where you going?”

“West Seattle.”

“Get in!”

Whoa there bucko.

“How much will it be? You’re not metered (towncars aren’t).”

“How much you want to pay?”

Ha. Right. I’m out. I’m not into getting my kidneys stolen tonight.

Eventually, he drives off with another couple up the street. I’m willing to wait for an actual taxi. These guys should know their prices.

After about 10-20 minutes of collective waiting, a taxi arrives and takes us back to my buddy’s pad.

We give $45 for a $20 ride because hey, it’s New Year’s. Happy 2011. He was good driver too.

—

The morning after, we hit up Endolyne Joe’s one of the best breakfast places in West Seattle. While waiting to be seated, Many people are recounting their stories from the previous night. The words “drunk,” “hungover,” and “crazy” are overheard more times from total strangers than I can count.

We sit near the bar for faster seating, chow down on migas and juevos rancheros washed down with healthy doses of coffee and tea, looking forward to another great year in Seattle. Bring it on 2011.