Crack Cocaine

November 8, 2010 10:35 pm Sir Haxington Stories

This story is definitely mature rated. Proceed with caution.

…

“Going to be a great night. Going to be a great night. Going to be…”

He was prepping himself in the mirror. What a night it could be! Senior year. Going up into the woods. Allegheny. Probably drinking. Girls. Maybe even hot girls. Drinking though, yes. Social lubricant. Alcohol does interesting things to 17 year olds.

Chris and Brian, his good friends promised this to be a great night. Going up the river with a bunch of older kids, and the fact that alcohol would be present meant tonight would be crazy. They had been through a lot together. AP classes, rounds of Goldeneye and shenanigans the Mafia and the CIA would be proud of. Drinking however, was not their specialty. The last time they drank was at Chris’ house that one time when the two hot blondes showed up and tried to force Brian to smoke cigarettes on Chris’ trampoline. But that was only because they managed to score a few fifths of vodka through some of his football player friends. They wouldn’t have come otherwise, let’s be honest. Alcohol was the reason they were there at all. Typical girls.

Or was it the Spring Break at Brian’s where Angela’s brother showed up and stole the tap from the keg and raided the medicine cabinet, stealing all the foster kids’ medicine? Wow. That was an interesting night. Not to mention the very hot Junior girls making out in the jacuzzi the night before. What was that all about? It was uncomfortable and unsavory, to say the least. But kinda awesome. And these are stories for another time.

He was sure he wasn’t going to need to bring anything to drink. He was only a senior after all. Some of the community college guys that would supposedly be there would be bringing in the big guns. Milwaukee’s Best Ice and Bud Light for sure. Would there be any hard a? Maybe. He and his crew probably wouldn’t be privy to the glory that is Hood River Distillery Vodka, but maybe they could sneak a bottle away once they were there. Yes, I’m sure they could, in fact, what if we…

Wait, would Haley be there? She went to the “other” school in town. You know, the crappy one. The school with the terrible colors that reminded you of human excrement and a mascot that every good student at his school learned to hate at an early age. Yes, Haley, the slut would most likely be there.

Oh boy. Haley. Was she hot? Maybe. One might argue she was hot because she put out so much. Some might argue that was a turn-off. In any case, one would never argue that the sexual output of this girl was legendary, even by Las Vegas standards. The last time he had a run in with Haley was when she tried to break into his truck. To be fair, he locked Chris, his best friend, into his truck which happened to be Haley’s most sought after sexual prize. Being the good guy he was, he ran slut interference, fully understanding that this was the moral thing to do. In fact, he’s still thanked to this day for taking such heroic actions. If there was some sort of high school party Medal of Valor, he would have won it. Achievement unlocked. STD avoided.

But that was another night of binge drinking and out of town parents. This night promised to be no different.

Pumping Tupac Shakur with Chris and Brian in the truck, they took the twenty mile drive out into the middle of nowhere from the middle of nowhere. Twenty miles from police. Twenty miles from adult supervision. In Coos Bay time and by Coos Bay rules, that’s at least forty minutes to an hour before anyone can get to where our crew was headed. And with no cell phones and only pagers to worry about, this was bound to be a Lord of the Flies kind of night. The best kind of night.

Dark, scary, winding roads along a river whipping by. Roads turning into skinny two lanes. Then one lane. Only gravel. 20 mph. 10 mph. Campsites. Nervous feelings. Excitement. There we are.

He pointed out Josh’s truck, Randy’s truck, Penny’s car. A bunch of cars and mostly trucks they didn’t recognize. At least they knew a few of their classmates out here, so it wouldn’t be totally awkward.

His vehicle fit right in with the rest. Well, maybe it was too nice. Where he’s from, people aren’t used to having nice things. A roll cage and KC lights though. Pretty much the shit, as it were. The three rolled out of the truck feeling so fresh and so clean. Ain’t nobody as dope as them! That was, until they saw Haley. Sure enough, Haley almost immediately attached herself to Chris like a starving leech. Chris couldn’t help but go along with her and separated from the group almost immediately. He was already rubbing the keys in his pocket and preparing to lock Chris away from Haley’s slut tactics again, if necessary.

He and Brian morally shrugged for the time being and headed over to the large bonfire some of the more industrious students had built. A sizable group, maybe twenty kids were gathered around the flames. As it turned out, no one was over twenty-one, but three giant coolers filled with various collections of cheap beer and ice were readily available. A few kids recognized the pair and waved them over, told them to grab some beers and join the circle. They obliged. In his town, there were very few lines drawn between groups. Everyone pretty much got along even if they had widely different interests and upbringings.

Conversations among teenagers are largely uninteresting in retrospect. Mrs. Smith is crazy. Mr Koyovitz is crazier. That one sub had a mustache. Did you see it? Goldeneye is awesome. What college do you plan on going to? The military? Now is a good time to join, I can’t imagine the US getting into a real war anytime soon…

Maybe a 1/2 hour passed. Maybe 1/2 a beer was consumed when Chris came running over and joined the circle.

“Guys, there is some crazy shit going on tonight.”

The three politely departed the circle and made a circle of their own, like they usually did. First order of business. Haley. What the fuck is going on with Haley?

“Oh, she’s already making out with some other dude from her shitty school. Don’t worry, I was trying to get rid of her since we got here.”

“Damn. Well, you can’t make a ho a housewife. Or so I’ve heard.”

Does that even make sense? Never mind.

“So what’s the big deal now? Why am I not drinking beer and trying to get in Stephenie’s pants??”

“Look, I heard Jay and Amy ran off into the bushes like a half hour ago. They’re missing.”

Of course, this meant one of two things. One, Jay and Amy (or Jay-Me as people called them around school) were getting it on in the bushes and it was going to be a great story to tell if they were found them doing so. Two, it’s entirely possible they could be lost in the woods and actually need to saving. There’s cougars, bears and bobcats out here. Not exactly the most friendly creatures. It wouldn’t b the first time they’ve saved their classmates either.

Of course they left to go find them, because that meant adventure. And standing in a circle around a fire while drinking beer can be done when they’re 30 and they own houses on the beach.

Sure enough, only after a short jaunt into the woods, they found Amy’s car. Only a little further away, faint sounds of teen lovemaking could be heard coming from the bushes. Then the “Shhhes!” which meant that yes, they were getting it on. And they weren’t far away. Boom Shaka-laka! Mission accomplished.

But that was it. The end. They were doing it and it really wasn’t all that exciting. More embarrassing, really. Especially to Brian. Bored, Brian returned to the fire circle. The remaining two switched gears and now wanted to play a practical joke on Amy. Vehicles are always a great place to start.

The red CRX was unlocked. Maybe they’d just wait here until she was done to embarrass her? They were all friends, or at least acquaintances, so it wasn’t that big of a deal. She might get mad, but Jay won’t care. He’s a cool guy.

He sat in the driver’s seat and Chris in the passenger seat. They usually let the prank come to them rather than forcing it. Oh, a purse! She left her purse here!

“Maybe there’s a condom in here we should go bring her,” one of them joked.

He pretended to drive her car. However, something about the purse unnaturally drew him towards it.

Fuck it.

He began invading Amy’s privacy while Chris watched intently. A lighter. A wallet. A pager. Chapstick. Makeup. Tampons. Typical girl stuff. Boring.

Oh, interesting. An ornate red case. It looked supremely magical. Definitely an outlier. Let’s set that aside for now. Tissues. Asprin. Gum.

Oh! The case. What could be inside of…wait. What the FUCK is this?

Inside the case was a small baggie. Inside the baggie was some sort of white powdery substance caking the inside. Larger white crystalline chunks settled at the bottom.

He knew almost immediately what it was, only because he was forced to take DARE classes in school and police officers had shown him first hand what this stuff looked like. Although for some reason, this was a lot scarier and very much real.

“Craaaaaack coooooccaaaaine!” He started singing while waving the baggie around. Chris started laughing. However, it didn’t take more than a few seconds for the gravity of the situation hit them. They started freaking out. What should they do with it? Keep it? Hide it? Tell everyone? Tell no one? Oh God, they had never been around REAL drugs before. Well, not THESE kinds of drugs. And here was a bag of actual, very real crack cocaine in their hands while the owner of said crack cocaine was getting porked in the woods not more than 100 feet away. And she had no idea that her very major secret had just been uncovered in the most random way possible.

How Amy had lost all that weight this year now made perfect sense.

After passing it back and forth like the narcotic version of hot potato and screeching like five year old school children, they quickly stuffed it back in the purse, not really sure how to proceed. They weren’t idiots. They had no desire to try crack, pretty much ever. Beer was a relatively new thing and crack just never seemed that appealing. They watched enough TV to know it was bad. But here they were holding a Class C Felony in their hands, making immature and uncomfortable jokes about it like they always did when faced with stressful situations.

So back in the purse it went. And out of the car they went. And back to the fire circle they went. He and Chris grabbed Brian, told him the situation. They didn’t stay much longer. The discovery and reality of being around crack was a bit of a scary prospect. They could fuck up their chances of getting into a good college, and they’ve been caught at parties before. Not good if crack is around.

Back in the truck they went, with a mix of Tupac and Ace of Base pumping to their hasty retreat. The only thought on their minds was how Haley ended up not being that much of a problem, but Amy, somewhat hot and who they thought was smart Amy was getting banged in the woods. While they fingered her crack.